Its when I get crit I didn't expect that I have a hard time taking it.
Yes, those are the absolute worst. I'm lucky that when I was in high school, my creative writing teacher took a particular interest in me; she provided detailed, thoughtful and thorough criticism on whatever I handed in (and asked for more, though that was usually non-credit stuff). Giving her anything at all meant that I was going to get my work handed back in shreds -- but in a good way. It was a blind crit; I never knew what I was going to get back.
So I got used to that sort of thing.
But what really gutted me is when I gave the Spouse something I wrote and asked him to crit it, and he did... but it was less of a crit and more of a gutting, disemboweling, bloody wall-painting. Getting that back was brutal. I'd never been so horrified before -- my story wasn't good enough for my own husband! Who's supposed to love me! Who should hold me and pet my hair and tell me my writing was the most wonderfulest thing on the face of the earth!
When I blew my nose a few times and washed my face of blubbering tears, I went to him and asked, "Um, except for all this... Did you, you know, like it?"
He did, but the point is, I didn't expect the serial killing. When I got over it and looked at the crit again, I realized he had pretty good points. But after that, no amount of criticism from anyone could hurt my feelings.
(We're still married, in case you were wondering...)
Nowadays, if I get criticism, I'm happy, because someone's caught a mistake, a typo, a glaring continuity issue, or a plot hole big enough to drive a Mack truck through. Sometimes it will annoy me in the sense of "That's it? Where's the crit?". If I disagree with their comments, I'll do it in private (or at the Spouse, who suffers for my art), but I'll always go back to the comments and appreciate the criticism.
It's Okay to whinge (in private). It's Okay to throw temper tantrums (in private). There's nothing wrong with that. I'm sure a lot of people do it. I'm as guilty as anyone of moping and pouting and whining.
But what's Not Okay is thinking your work is substandard. Never think that. There's a reason why people call their writing Works In Progress -- because their writing is always in some degree of progress or improvement.
You'll get there, I promise. Just keep telling yourself that your work is not sub-par. Tell yourself it's a work in progress. Every day.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2008-10-18 06:41 pm (UTC)Its when I get crit I didn't expect that I have a hard time taking it.
Yes, those are the absolute worst. I'm lucky that when I was in high school, my creative writing teacher took a particular interest in me; she provided detailed, thoughtful and thorough criticism on whatever I handed in (and asked for more, though that was usually non-credit stuff). Giving her anything at all meant that I was going to get my work handed back in shreds -- but in a good way. It was a blind crit; I never knew what I was going to get back.
So I got used to that sort of thing.
But what really gutted me is when I gave the Spouse something I wrote and asked him to crit it, and he did... but it was less of a crit and more of a gutting, disemboweling, bloody wall-painting. Getting that back was brutal. I'd never been so horrified before -- my story wasn't good enough for my own husband! Who's supposed to love me! Who should hold me and pet my hair and tell me my writing was the most wonderfulest thing on the face of the earth!
When I blew my nose a few times and washed my face of blubbering tears, I went to him and asked, "Um, except for all this... Did you, you know, like it?"
He did, but the point is, I didn't expect the serial killing. When I got over it and looked at the crit again, I realized he had pretty good points. But after that, no amount of criticism from anyone could hurt my feelings.
(We're still married, in case you were wondering...)
Nowadays, if I get criticism, I'm happy, because someone's caught a mistake, a typo, a glaring continuity issue, or a plot hole big enough to drive a Mack truck through. Sometimes it will annoy me in the sense of "That's it? Where's the crit?". If I disagree with their comments, I'll do it in private (or at the Spouse, who suffers for my art), but I'll always go back to the comments and appreciate the criticism.
It's Okay to whinge (in private). It's Okay to throw temper tantrums (in private). There's nothing wrong with that. I'm sure a lot of people do it. I'm as guilty as anyone of moping and pouting and whining.
But what's Not Okay is thinking your work is substandard. Never think that. There's a reason why people call their writing Works In Progress -- because their writing is always in some degree of progress or improvement.
You'll get there, I promise. Just keep telling yourself that your work is not sub-par. Tell yourself it's a work in progress. Every day.