Squad

[rin-666.livejournal.com]

Hi guys, I'm new here and it's great to find somewhere like this. I've recently found the urge to write once more and found one story I was working on before I really lost the urge. However reading through it actually caused me pain...the characters were so Mary Sue ish!!!!! The ideas were vague! However I still believe the story itself at basic level is a good one. I'd like to go over what I've written and re hash it however I'd like other people's opinion about whether the story is worth that work so I hereby present "Squad".

The basic premise: T, Kat and Jay are part of an organisation. Put together as a team due to their abilities unique to them they discover that the organisation is not everything they thought and "escape". The story starts as it should start, at the beginning when their team is formed.

Please I would like only constructive criticism, I'm aware the writing's a bit hacky but I wrote it when I was 16...I'm now 24.
( Squad )

Well if you've made your way through that well done it's a bit of a slog! That's only part of it but hopefully enough to get you thinking yeah there's something there or good god it should never be done ever again! Gogin through it there are plot bunnies galore and awful, awful writing but please just look at the story itself. Thank you :D