The Pick Up Line Game #2

[aeriedraconia.livejournal.com]

We haven't played this game for a while.


The Pick Up line/Opening Line/First line Game

Post the first line of the main story or stories that you are working on.

Then, those of us reading them can reply with:
Does it or doesn't it make you want to read more?

And for the fun of it:
Guess the genre?
Guess what happens next?

Comments

[knittingknots.livejournal.com]

His mother used to tell him when he was a small boy that fairs were the most amazing, wondrous, messy things.

[starlight83.livejournal.com]

Want to read more: Yes. This is great.
Genre: Mainstream/slice of life
What happens next: He actually goes to a fair and is seriously disappointed.

[lenaf007.livejournal.com]

I love the word messy in this description.

[vflower.livejournal.com]

Yes I would want to read more... Definitely has the potential to be fiction, fantasy, sci-fi, or magical realism.

[mercury-hall.livejournal.com]

Want to read more: A little bit.
Genre: That weird Young Adult genre that's kind of it's own little thing.
What happens next: He finds out his mother met her one true love at a fair, but they couldn't be together.

[knittingknots.livejournal.com]

In case anybody's interested, you can read a chunk of this here: http://wordssurroundme.blogspot.com/2011/01/one-day-at-fair.html

[artierayne.livejournal.com]

Want to read more: Yes, its defintely a very catching line.

Genre: Little uncertain, could really open up to go in any direction. But I pick fantasy because it's my favourite.

What happens next: I would guess that an actual fair comes into play, although for better or worse is questionable.

Very nice start, really love the descriptors you used.

[starlight83.livejournal.com]

Sounds fun! Here's mine (plus the second because my first line is so tiny--sorry for my flagrant disregard for the rules!):

The owl was a bad omen. Nerie found it sitting perched in broad daylight on the naked limb of an old tree just outside the tavern door.

[lenaf007.livejournal.com]

Want to read more: Yes, I want to find out why the owl was a bad omen.
Genre: I'm going to say fantasy, just because you use the word tavern instead of bar or pub.
What happens next: Something bad happens at the tavern.

[knittingknots.livejournal.com]

oooh...I wanna read more. Makes me think of fantasy. What happens next? Something odd takes place in the tavern that leads Nerie on an interesting quest.

[lenaf007.livejournal.com]

Very cool! Here are the first lines from two pieces I'm working on:

1) No matter what Suzie did, she couldn't convince herself this was a good idea.

2) A throbbing headache was nagging at his temples, and as he slowly traveled toward consciousness, he wondered whether or not he truly wanted to wake up.

[starlight83.livejournal.com]

Number 1

Want to read more: Sure
Genre: YA or maybe Romance
What happens next: Suzie goes through with it and it does turn out to be a terrible idea but the bad result drives the rest of the story.

Number 2

Want to read more: I'm on the fence with this one because waking up with a headache isn't quite gripping until you know why the character has one. So I'd read on to get more info and then decide.
Genre: No idea. Could be anything!
What happens next: Hungover, he manages to get up and fetch a cup of coffee.

Pick up line game

[jennyharker.livejournal.com]

"Sex is the subject of today's sermon," announced Father Miguel Inez.

Re: Pick up line game

[starlight83.livejournal.com]

Want to read more: Yes!
Genre: I have no idea. YA?
What happens next: Everybody is uncomfortable and, hopefully, a very amusing and enlightening sermon on sex!

Re: Pick up line game

[mercury-hall.livejournal.com]

Want to read more: For sure!
Genre: Slice of life? Or that weird Young Adult thing again. XD

[secondlongest.livejournal.com]

The lonely stretch of highway led them to a small, empty town. A bent and rusty shopping cart lay on it's side in an empty parking lot.

[the-mome-wrath.livejournal.com]

Read more: Maybe, it would really depend on the next few sentences.
genre: disaster, horror or scifi dystopia
what's next: Scene and mood setting, then enter the main character

[the-mome-wrath.livejournal.com]

The only light was that from the anorexic waning moon, barely enough to line the edges of the dark foliage with the barest edge of silver. Just enough to keep from tripping.

[vflower.livejournal.com]

Hmm... it's very descriptive and image driven but the line doesn't really tell me as the reader anything at all.

Genre: Fiction, mystery, or adventure

What happens: Not sure... the main character sneaks through something but what, we're not sure.

[vflower.livejournal.com]

Laura died at age twenty and no one really knew why.

[canaryh.livejournal.com]

I want to know why Laura died, but since you mention her and not the narrator, it's Laura that I'm interested in, and she's already dead.

genre: doesn't exclude any genre

what happens: the narrator tells the reader why nobody knows the reason for Laura's death

[canaryh.livejournal.com]

Maybe, I screamed all the way down.

[mercury-hall.livejournal.com]

Want to read more: SO MUCH!
Genre: Fantasy/Sci-Fi/Horror

[mercury-hall.livejournal.com]

"Erica Dane does not know what a tree looks like."

[secondlongest.livejournal.com]

Want to read more: Of course
Genre: Not sure, but I'd say either sci-fi or dystopia

[secondlongest.livejournal.com]

Here's another opening line from something else I'm working on.

"It has been approximately 91 years, 4 months, and 27 days since we've been in the simulation. Each day is worse than the last."

[mercury-hall.livejournal.com]

Science Fiction/Fantasy. Or in between. *shrug* It reminded me of Inception.

[artierayne.livejournal.com]

"Leopold Cates never wanted to be important."

[mercury-hall.livejournal.com]

Action/Mystery

[mercury-hall.livejournal.com]

Fantasy?

More than one sentence but literally all I have of the story...

[mercury-hall.livejournal.com]

I realize it's been a while since this was posted, but I just started something I'm really having trouble with the beginning and logistics of, so I figured I'd throw it out there.

We traveled to a world where Morse code became our own personal language. "I suppose this is good," he said in dots and dashes, "since I could never find the right words to tell you how beautiful you are." So I suppose this is good. But I wish I could hear him say my name again.

Re: More than one sentence but literally all I have of the story...

[mercury-hall.livejournal.com]

ETA: This little paragraph is either the very beginning or the very end.

And just because it's fun...

[mercury-hall.livejournal.com]

Her and her sisters watch him from the forests near his house.